Friday, February 12, 2010

Hello - A Little Back Ground

I am a mom whose son was molested by his older cousin. I sometimes feel so totally alone in my pain and inquiry. Statistics tell me there are a lot of parents out there like me and I thought I would start this blog in an attempt to reach them. At this moment it feels a little like my words are floating out into a dark hole and there is no way that anyone can ever hear them, yet here I am giving it a shot. This blog is to share my story, share support and realize I am not alone in this pain. My goal is to write weekly about the different stages I have gone through from the moment I found out. This is not a whine session but a step-by-step account of how I put one foot in front of the other when I wanted to forfeit this game we call life.


I will begin with a little history. I grew up in a Catholic home with four brothers and one sister. We are all very close. I was raised to be a good wife and take care of the kids. I always wanted ten children but happily ended up with two: Jack, 12, and Justin, 9. Two is perfect; I have two arms, one for each son. I am Christian with a strong faith but I dislike religion. I am not really sure how I ended up sitting here at this computer writing about my son’s abuse because I thought it could never happen to me. I had the talks. We spoke of sex. I didn’t let my boys stay the night at anyone’s homes. I was very careful. I guess all of that doesn’t matter. It happened. Am I to blame? Did I miss the signs? To know me you would never guess this secret I hold. You would never guess it happened to him and because it happened to him this is happening to me.

I have been married for twenty years to a man who was never capable of love. He is so hidden inside himself that it is a miracle that we had any children at all. I finally kicked him out in February 2009. It was wonderful! He had been disconnected emotionally from the three of us for all these years. I was on a path of repair. I sought counseling, started back to school and my life was moving up. Six months later it happened…

6 comments:

Ibn Hanif said...

MWH, Thanks for writing on this sensitive and important issue. I appreciate that you've started it nicely.

I think you not only need to share this story but you should also study and guide parents to prevent their children's innocence.

Keep up your good job!

Best Wishes!

eYeWitness (Blogcatalog)

Emily said...

I think this blog is incredibly sensitive to your child's privacy while at the same time offering support and ripping open the silence around abuse. Thank you for doing this.

Mom Who Hurts said...

Thank you so much for your support and kind words.

MWH

ariela cohen said...

Please email: arielacohen99@gmail.com if you are a survivor of abuse in Thailand, Cambodia, the USA, Ireland and central France by Chris and Clare Godson who lead the predatory paedophile Godson Cult. Please read: lacreusehostsevilcult.blogspot.com for guidance concerning this cult and the entrapment website at pilgrim23.com.

ariela cohen said...

Please contact: arielacohen99@gmail.com if you need help and advice or feel threatened in Benevent l'Abbaye by the presence of the Godson Cult and the "activities" of Chris and Clare Godson. We can help you break away from this cult and protect your children.

ariela cohen said...

Our mirror whistleblower blog about Chris and Clare Godson can be found at: slippingbeneaththeradar.WordPress.com. The Godson Cult has colonised the sleepy french town of Benevent l'Abbaye in central France by buying over 20 houses. Email: arielacohen99@gmail.com

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I am an average mom who loves her kids. I never thought it could happen to us but it did. My son was abused. Words to live by: Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.